A year of gratitude

a year of gratitude - when sex hurts there is hopeI should probably begin by explaining what 2014 was for me. When everyone was preparing to ring in the New Year at the end of 2013, I was reflecting on all that had happened and what a shift in my life had occurred in just one short year. I think the 13 in 2013 was rather appropriate considering it held some of the worst moments of my life. And with the end of my marriage also came an end to my life’s plans and expectations as I had once held them. No more did I see a future centered around a marriage and kids. So what did I now see? Instead of making a list of resolutions for the New Year I knelt down beside my bed at the stroke of midnight and prayed that 2014 would be a year full of new beginnings.

1 John 5:14 says “…if we ask anything in His name He hears us.” Well God certainly heard me and filled my year with a multitude of new beginnings. Continue reading

God at the center

God at the center - when sex hurts there is hope

I truly believe that the number one factor in a successful marriage is keeping God at the center of it. I have met some amazing couples who have been through their share of life’s struggles and yet have the strongest connection to each other, a passionate love that you can see in every interaction. And they will tell you how it hasn’t always been easy, how they never could have done it on their own. They will tell you of times that they wanted to give up and times that it was just too difficult for them. Then they will tell you how God at the center is what made all the difference, giving them the courage and strength they needed to overcome. Continue reading

We are what he has made us

God's masterpiece - when sex hurts there is hopeFor we are what he has made us, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand to be our way of life. Ephesians 2:10 (NRSV)

This verse has a lot that we can apply to our lives such as doing good works and the way of life Christ followers should live. But what has personally spoken into my life is the first line—we are what he has made us. If you suffer from painful sex or any kind of pelvic pain, it can be easy to fall into negative thoughts. What is wrong with me? Did God mess up when he created me? Did I do something wrong along the way to end up here? Why me? Why did it have to be this way? Continue reading

Overflow with hope

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13 (NIV)*

hope - when sex hurts there is hopeThis is my favorite verse and has become somewhat of a theme verse for my life over this past year or so.  God brought it to me during the most difficult time of my marriage, just as it was falling apart.  I have recited it to myself more times than I can count, and shared it with many others.  I remember having lunch with a close friend, filling her in on some of what had been going on in my life.  As I told her about the hurt and hardships, unsure about the fate of my marriage, I also had to tell her about the amazing things God had been doing to remind me that I was in His care.  When I shared the verse with her, she told me that while listening to me tell my story, she couldn’t find any better description—that I was overflowing with hope.

Overflowing with hope doesn’t necessarily mean you have all the answers.  In fact, I would argue that having hope by definition requires that you don’t have all the answers—you can’t hope for something that you already have or already know to be true.  Continue reading